Remembering pain makes you stronger.

Many of you know know the miracle story of my little Jeremiah. Some of you do not. In as short of a story as I possibly can I will share what happened... it will be a bit lengthy. In January 2006, Jeremiah was 1 month short of 2 years old. It was a Friday. He woke up totally fine. By 11:30 that afternoon he was having unexplained pain in his left upper thigh area... achy pain. By 2:30 he was in worse pain, and running 102 temperature. We went to the Dr. that evening around 8:00. At this point his fever, even in Ibuprofen and Tylenol, could not be controlled and the pain was even worse. They couldn't find anything wrong. The next morning about 7:00 a.m. He wouldn't even let us touch the leg and the fever was 103. The Dr. that had seen us actually called us because she could not sleep. She told me to go immediately to Texas Children's, they would be waiting for me. We went, poor child was so lethargic with fever and unbearable pain. By that evening we were notified by the chief of infectious disease that he had an insanely massive infection brewing, but they wouldn't know what it was for 48 hours when the cultures from his blood draws grew and they could test it. We were admitted and Jeremiah was started on morphine via IV and the highest dose of the most toxic antibiotics you can imagine. Sunday morning Jeremiah started to have pain in his right shoulder. They had notified us that they were planning to do an MRI on Monday, because they don't do them on the weekends. Well, three hours later Jeremiah's pain in his shoulder was worse, the fever was still not under control and they came to notify us that they called in an MRI team. His pain was so severe that even fully sedated for the MRI he was wincing with pain when they would touch his leg or shoulder. Monday morning we heard that the infection he had was a strain that they had only ever scene in victims of high trauma experiences, for instance those that survived the World Trade Center collapse or the Oklahoma City Bombing. (their words not mine) Out of the last 2000 cases, none had been susceptible to antibiotics and resulted in fatality. Later that evening the pain had spread to his right thigh. During the night they did yet another MRI, at this point they saw the infection had totally eaten away all of his muscle in his left thigh and buttocks, it had penetrated into the bone of his shoulder and was eating away the muscle and buttocks of his right side. Fever still not controlled. Tuesday we hear a great report, his strain of infection WAS susceptible to antibiotics. However, they did not know why it was still spreading through the blood stream after being on the medicine for 3 days. Wednesday same as Tuesday no change. Thursday Jeremiah's heart begins to flutter. The infection is attempting to penetrate his heart. If this happens, there is nothing they can do. They put him on every antibiotic they could without killing him, he was on the maximum dose of morphine, toradol, Ibuprofen and Tylenol. Prayer for him was going around the globe! Pastor David Flanders from England came to visit and started a chain of people in Europe praying for him. Our pastors and church family were incredible, our friends were amazing. This kid was affecting so many thousands of people, bringing them to their knees... even some that hadn't prayed in a very long time showed up to pray over him. Friday was our turnaround day. A week after this all started, we finally saw some improvement. We spent 10 more days in the hospital. He was released with a tube that went straight into his heart through one his major arteries, that we used to administer medication every 4 hours for the next 2 months. We were in total isolation, due to his lack of immune system. He had lost more than 30% of his body weight and he had to re-learn to walk. In April he was released from care by the very doctor who had seen him in the ER. She said there was no reason why this child should still be alive, she never thought he would survive... But God. To this day he is entered into a case study to determine how he could possible have gotten this strain of infection, no reason has ever be determined.

During every second of what happened, not once did we ever think we would lose him. We never "lost" it. That is the one and only time in my life that I can undeniably say that I truly experienced peace beyond my understanding and faith beyond my reason. He is alive because of an undeniable miracle of God. His life has been destined for a greater purpose by God, and no matter how hard the enemy tried to take him, my God is greater! Thank God Jeremiah doesn't remember any of it... but I sure do. The tears are still instant when I tell the story, the pain is still fresh when I dream about it but so is the rush of peace and the surge of faith. Remembering my pain makes me stronger. I pray that it doesn't take something so intense to bring you to a place of such peace or faith... but when you have those times, DO NOT push the feelings down, do not try to forget. Find God in those moments, remember what he showed you in your brokenness, in your desperation... it will make you stronger.